Counselling & Emotional Wellbeing

I feel stressed and anxious

We would all agree that student life can be stressful; decisions to be made, problems to be solved, exams to be taken and money worries.

A certain level of stress can be energising and could motivate us to try new things and challenge us.  Sometimes stress and anxiety can be overwhelming and we can feel that it holds us back rather than gives us what we need.

Everyone experiences feelings of stress and anxiety at some point in their life.  For example, you may feel fearful at the thought of sitting an exam or attending an interview.  However, people with more constant stress and anxiety find it hard to control their worries.  You may feel anxious about a wide range of situations and issues, rather than one specific event.  People with this type of anxiety feel anxious most days.  Symptoms vary from person to person, but can include feeling worried or irritable and having trouble concentrating or sleeping.

Sometimes even the happy things in life can generate a sense of stress and anxiety too.

Read our Anxiety Leaflet  

I’m stressed

We would all agree that student life today can be stressful; decisions need to be made, problems solved, assignments completed, exams revised for, money (or the lack of it) managed, relationships worked out and not forgetting those library books that are six weeks late.

It’s often very difficult to find the time, energy and resources to deal with everything that university life throws at you and it’s not hard to see why stress levels can soar.  We are all more aware of stress; it’s a word often used to describe how we feel, but what is it and how can we manage our stress better?

I think I’m drinking too much

Student life can be fun and exhilarating as well as stressful at times.  Socialising often occurs at the Student Union and other venues where alcohol is available.  New students eager to form new friendships may use alcohol to relax and overcome their inhibitions.  If it is consumed in moderation (within agreed health limits) it can help people relax and unwind after a hard day.  If not it can lead to health problems, unplanned pregnancies, accidents and relationship breakdowns.

If you are concerned about your drinking levels and worried you might be drinking too much, read our Alcohol Leaflet  

Drug issues

The information around drugs and drug use changes frequently and we suggest you check out Talk to Frank or Turning Point

Counsellors can also work with you to look at some of the underlying issues which might be contributing to drug use and support you through any changes you decide to make.

I’m not eating well

Eating problems can often be associated with internal, emotional problems. Obsessive thoughts about, and the behaviour associated with, food are used to deal with emotional distress which cannot be expressed in any other satisfactory way. The emotional distress is often to do with a negative perception of self, a feeling of being unable to change "bad" things about yourself: food is used as an inappropriate way of taking control.

This may show itself in compulsive eating; depriving yourself of food and possibly anorexia and/or bulimia.

If you are concerned about your eating patterns and want some help, please read our Eating Leaflet  

I’ve been sexually assaulted or harassed

Being harassed, sexually assualted and/or raped can be a seriously distressing experience, whether it happened years ago or only yesterday.

You may have been left with feelings of fear, guilt, powerlessness, anger, shame, depression or lacking in self confidence. It can be difficult to talk about your experience and your subsequent feelings to anyone. Yet, this is a time when support and understanding can be so helpful. Ideally, do seek help from the university counsellors. You may also find our  useful.

I feel angry a lot of the time

Feeling angry is a common emotion. Most people feel angry at some point in their lives. There is no obvious reason why some people experience anger more than others. There can be all sorts of factors including our character and our early chilhood experiences.

If you are someone who feels angry a lot of the and would like to understand more of what is going on and you would like some tips on managing your anger please read our managing anger leaflet for further sources of support.

I’m self-harming

Most of us act at some time in a way that is harmful to our body whether it be by drinking, smoking or other excesses. Sometimes you may choose to inflict injury on yourself in a more deliberate way such as cutting, burning, stabbing, scratching, hair pulling and bruising. Such action is rarely an attempt at suicide or an expression of madness; however, it is a sign there are problems that need addressing.

It is usually a way of indicating that difficulties exist and is also an attempt to cope with the problems. Please read our self harm leaflet to find out more if you are self harming or if you know someone who is.

I feel suicidal

The problems that lead to suicidal thinking are very complex. Often they are problems of great severity which carry with them deep feelings of shame, loneliness and hopelessness.

If you are contemplating suicide or worried about a friend who seems to be considering suicide talk to a university counsellor or someone with whom you feel 'safe' with. Talking is a way to express some of the distress and pain you are suffering and often brings emotional relief and, in turn will give you less desire to act on any suicidal thoughts.

Please see our Suicidal Thoughts Leaflet  for futher sources of support

I’m not sleeping well

Sleep is a necessity. Without it we eventually become ill. Even minor levels of deprivation make us irritable and may reduce concentration and reaction times. However, everyone has different needs for sleep, some being perfectly healthy on as little as four hours sleep a night.

If you are not sleeping well it is important to look at what might be triggering your insomnia and/or irregular sleep patterns. It may be to do with the stress you are under or with more physical problems such as lack of exercise. Please read our Insomnia Leaflet to get a better understanding of why you are not sleeping well and tips to help yourself sleep more soundly!

My parents are getting divorced

Parents divorce for many reasons. Usually divorce happens when couples feel they can no longer live together due to fighting and anger or because the love they had when they married has changed.

Divorce can also be because one parent falls in love with someone else or even due to a serious problem like drinking or abuse.

Sometimes it is because they have just decided to live apart. If your parents are divorcing, you may feel stressed out, angry, helpless, frustrated or sad.

You may also feel relieved, especially if there has been a lot of tension or fighting at home. These feelings are typical and talking about them with a friend, family member or counsellor can really help.

I'm having panic attacks

Panic attacks are not as rare as you may think! All of us feel stressed and anxious sometimes and extreme anxiety can lead to panic attacks. It can be a very frightening experience, especially if it's happening to you for the first time. You may think you are having a heart attack or that you are going mad or even that you are going to die. None of these are likely to be the case but sometimes going to your GP and getting checked out can help to ease your mind and allay any worries about physical health. 

The best way to stop panic attacks happening in the first place is to look at actively keeping your anxiety levels as low as possible. If you do feel on the edge of a panic attack there are a number of things you might do to help yourself.  One of the simplest and most effective is a breathing exercise which can be done almost anywhere;

1. Focus on your breathing and relax your shoulders.

2. Breathe in to a count of four through your nose.

3. Exhale to a count of four through your mouth.

4. Repeat this four times.